Just a Reminder: You’re Not His 'One That Got Away'

Lately, I've been watching Netflix's Sneaky Links. I know—it's shallow, right? But I love a good dose of reality TV, especially when it comes with a side of messy romance and chaotic connections.

And after bingeing enough of it, I feel like there's something a lot of women need to hear—so here it is:

He doesn’t want you.

He doesn’t like you—not in the way you like him.
He doesn’t think about you the way you think about him.
Actually, he doesn’t think about you at all.

You're not crossing his mind.
Your life, your feelings, your presence—they’re not a concern for him.
He doesn’t care who you are as a person; he only cares about what he gets out of the situation.

He doesn’t want a commitment—maybe because his life’s a mess, or maybe because he’s just incapable of real intimacy.
He's emotionally unavailable, possibly emotionally immature.
You're just... there.
Convenient. Easy access. A distraction from his boredom—whether that’s with life, work, or even his relationship.

He doesn’t have feelings for you. Not like the ones you have for him.
You're not "the one" he’s waiting for.
You're not the person that pops into his head when a love song plays.
You’re not the one he pictures in the future.

You're not the one preventing him from sleeping at night.

There is no real connection, for him.

And here’s the hardest truth that so many of us resist:
If he wanted to, he would.

That’s the whole story. No decoding needed.
So stop chasing.
Stop peeling back your soul for someone who wouldn’t recognize its beauty if it hit him in the face.
Stop giving vulnerability to someone who’s made it clear he won’t hold it with care.

We get so wrapped up in the idea of romance that we forget: he isn’t.

There’s nothing romantic here. Nothing genuine. Nothing sacred.

And now you're watching He's Just Not That Into You, thinking about Scarlett Johansson and Bradley Cooper's characters. Yeah, it sucks. Been there. We’ve all told ourselves, “We’re better off as friends,” while knowing that even friendship was a stretch.

Sure, sometimes it works out.
Sometimes he is honest, emotionally available, and ready.
But most of the time?

We're just fooling ourselves.

The connection doesn't need to happen right now, but be honest, be real, value each other.